Monday, June 23, 2008

Men may be the enemy.

I have always subscribed to the theory that woman are as bad as the men they date when it comes to deceiving, cheating, misleading or otherwise destroying relationships/other people. Personally, I know that for every instance I have complained about a guy blowing me off or otherwise "wronging" me, I have probably done the same thing to different person. But lately, I am starting to question whether women really are as bad as their male counterparts.

Cases in point::

1. Evil Troll and Her Evil Boyfriend:: This guy has now succeeded in successfully sleeping with or propositioning 100% of the women with whom Evil Troll has been closely associated over the last year. Arguably, Evil Troll deserves it. However, as far as I know, Evil Troll has been faithful to Her Evil Boyfriend. I think this means that Her Evil Boyfriend is actually more evil than Evil Troll. The thought makes me shudder.

2. Person I use to work with::
At the sweatshop at which I was previously employed, there is a woman who is phenomenal. Always positive, non-shit talking, funny and supa-smart. She had been married to a guy for about eight years [I totally made that up, I have no idea how long they have been married] and has two children with him [this part is true]. Recently, she has discovered that the bastard had been cheating. And not just a little. I was floor - FLOORED - when I heard about this. And sadly, so was she.

3. Guy my New Roommate is dating::
This guy, as far as I know, has not been cheating. He has however, managed over the course of 1.5 months to morph from a clever fun to be around guy into a controlling ass-wipe Aloof-Cool Guy [for those of you that don't know, "aloof-cool guy" is its own category of man - described below]. The fact they he has spiraled down so far in so short a time is alarming.

4. Guy my Old Friend S. dates:: I have mentioned this situation previously, but he is still totally running around behind her back. She is kind of an idiot for letting it happen, but still, can't blame the victim ya'll!

5. Guy my NY Bestie told me about::
NY Bestie has a friend who just broke up with her boyfriend of a lot of years after catching him text messaging and phone calling with strippers. They had just moved in together no less! I am a reasonable person who thinks that flirting is ok in a relationship, but there is no reason a boyfriend should be text messaging and talking on the phone with strippers. We are not talking about friends of his who happen to be strippers [which would be ok]. We are talking about strippers who he knows by virtue of his frequenting strip clubs [which is not ok].

And there are more current goings on of guys misbehaving amongst my friends that I don't even want to get into. But the point is, WTF fellas? What do you have to say for yourselves?

I hope that I am wrong about guys. Especially since I can't seem to stop liking em. I would like to think that any future relationships I have are not doomed as the cases above seem to suggest.

This might warrant another Highly Scientific Experiment.

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The "aloof-cool guy" is the guy that is super laid back, okay with everything, never gets mad, and is almost overly balanced. He is the kind of guy that says things like "it is what it is". This sounds good, right? It is, unless you are a normal girl [read:: slightly neurotic], in which case you will take Aloof-Cool Guy's demeanor and interpret it as not being interested in you. This will turn you into Needy Girlfriend who is always trying to get Aloof-Cool Guy to tell you/show you how much he cares. Aloof-Cool Guy will never give you such satisfaction because it is not in his nature. This will lead to infinitely circular conversations like the following::

Needy Girlfriend:: Do you want me to come?

Aloof-Cool Guy:: I want you to come if you want to.

Needy Girlfriend:: I only want to come if you want me to come.

Aloof-Cool Guy:: Well, if you want to come, just come.

etc., etc., etc.

It is a dark ugly road ladies, watch out. I have seen it too many times. The main problem with Aloof-Cool Guys is that they typically can't accept that their behavior impacts other people. And even if you tell them, they think of it as your problem and not their problem.

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* To one particular guy who I suspect will read this, I am really sorry. I didn't mean to be a jerk, I just kind of didn't know what to say. I am still routing for you on the Elite front.

5 comments:

tinzley said...

Men ARE the enemy mostly...You nailed it. Read my blog and share your thoughts. There are many men who make it hard on themselves, they are so busy searching for a specific type of woman, when they aren't even worthy of one.I sure want some fries right now...

The Hodge said...

A man-bashing post, lovely.

It's true there are a lot of bad ones out there, but for every story you mention I can name an equal number of deceitful women. Actually, my ex-gf told me last night how her roomie recently seduced a man who has been engaged all of a month.

A lot of it may be in perception. Being a man I'm more likely to demonize a woman for cheating than a man. And I would say that the opposite is true for women.

Leila said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Naughty Robot said...

So it is the girl's fault that a guy who is engaged cheated??

The Hodge said...

"So it is the girl's fault that a guy who is engaged cheated??"

I would say it's more mutual fault. Since she intentionally sought him because he was engaged (she's not a woman with high ethical standards I can tell you) and he's a fool for cheating.

Humans are primal creatures at heart it seems.