Thursday, November 29, 2007

It is Possible That I suck at Life. Maybe.

So I met this guy (herein dubbed forever T/S - as in Tall and Skinny) a short while ago. Think months. I won't get into how we met, but it was unusual. I've been seeing him for about a month now. And it is dawning on my sadly, that while the sex might be phenomenal, the man behind the penis may be flaccid. Yeah, I went there.

The real, truly, tragic part of this realization is this: today, on November 29, 2007 I post this realization, a hunch I feel pretty strongly is the truth, and still, again and again, you will read posts from me complaining about how this guy is hurting, disappointing, pleasing, occupying and fucking with me.

Why don't I walk away? Because, folks, it seems I am a masochist. Or maybe I am bored. I can't really tell right now. My having formed this blog gives credence to the bored theory, but I get I suppose I may have a little self-torturing attitude in me too.

And just to beat a horse to death, the reason this guy may be/probably is a dud is because he presented himself as being honest and with barrels of integrity which is what I was drawn to. And already, I have caught him in two lies. I have two things to say about that. 1. Why are people such fucking liars? Even the people I love. Lie. I am going to count how many lies I tell tomorrow. I wonder if I am a liar too. 2. If you are going to lie...at least be good at it. I mean seriously, saying you are one place on Tuesday, and then forgetting where you said were by Wednesday is really pathetic. I am conflicted right now as to whether I am more offended by the lies or the lack of effort in telling them.

And finally, I didn't confront him about the lie. In addition to my masochistic tendancy, I also happen to have a penchance for denial.

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